BUZZWORDS 2

Here is the usage or meaning I promised you.

Absorb and Enjoy!

10,000 foot view…a view of the situation that encompasses all and everything.

2K9-2K10…looking ahead to the 2009-2010 campaign

50-50-90 rule…given a 50-50 chance that things would go right this season, they went wrong 90% of the time.

Action items…what the Stars management have already jotted down for next year.

Air cover…this is when upper management takes the flak for an unpopular decision (can you say Sean Avery?)

Alpha pups…young guys who played significant roles (Neal, Brunnstrom, Niskanen, Eriksson, etc.)

Bad cosmetics…any action or practice that reflects badly on the organization (on a few occasions they were in need of a cosmetologist)

BFO…Blinding Flash of the Obvious, or, what I provided for 82 games.

Blameshift…the finger pointing that goes on behind the scenes of a losing season.

Blamestorm…the hockey departments upcoming meetings will surely incorporate a good measure of this.

Boiling the ocean…working hard without focus or purpose, or every game after being “officially” eliminated.

Centergistic…what the Stars, maybe to their detriment, became.

Circling the drain…what the Stars did from the moment they lost Captain Brenden Morrow

Climate sensing…Stars management’s upcoming random sensing of workforce attitudes.

Coachable moments…plenty of these for Tippett and his staff this season

Compensated endorser…at the root of our existence, what Ralph and me are.

CORFing…this is for you Stars fan. This is how you maintain self esteem when your team loses by Cutting off Responsibility for Failure through blasting the coach or the top players on call-in shows and message boards.

Deep dive…this is the in-depth exploration of a problem, issue or subject. (Strap on the flippers and oxygen tanks Stars hockey department!)

Deferred success…hopefully what Turco and company went with this season.

Double click…to give a topic more attention or evaluation. (ie The Stars will double-click on their backup goaltending situation)

Drinking from the fire hose…what many overwhelmed call-ups and youngsters appeared to be trying to do

Hedonic treadmill…as your salary rises so too do others expectations of you. (this is for Turco, Ribeiro and the rest of the $5M+ club)

Herding cats…what Tippett must have felt like he was attempting to do on many nights. Also, what this year’s Stars powerplay looked like it was doing.

Hot desking…what I do in my vocation…also known as location independent working, which I love.

Internal community…another way of saying “the group”, or “the players”

Kidult…an adult who still acts like a kid, ie Mike Modano

Knowledge transfer…what Sydor was asked to do with the Stars young d-men

LAQs…Lame Ass Quotes (also; “coachspeak”)

Lexicurious…what many of you were when I dropped “meritorious”, “oxter”, and “phalanx” on you this season.

Megadigm…the shift to a more aggressive and risky offense the Stars tried to implement out of training camp in an attempt to score more goals. (didn’t last, didn’t work)

StarsStuff store-gasm…what you may experience with the deep, end of season, merchandise discounts that commence…now.

Nerdvana…the area directly across from my seat on the plane where uber-nerds Jason Walsh and John Sponsler wage epic battles on their PS3 devices and suck back Dr. Peppers with no regard for the 23 flavors.

Ohno-second…the fraction of time, slightly longer than a nanosecond, that it takes to realize you goofed.

Out of runway…mid March

Pain points…those overtime and shootout losses, especially the two 1-0 losses.

Paula Abduling…what Ralph was doing for most of the 2008-09 season. (I’m more Simon)

Photox…the process of digitally removing pocks and blemishes from photographs. (especially handy for Icegirl calendar shoots)

Plowing water…what the Stars started doing around March 1st

Sarchasm…the gulf between my sarcastic wit and those of you who don’t get it.

Shortening the path to profitability…what the franchise will undoubtedly do going forward.

Smogging…a sales term.

Squeeze and tease…what you the Stars on TV fan endured during out telecasts when the game action was shrunk down in order to promote other sundry upcoming programs on the network.

Squirt the bird…big time TV jargon for having your game pumped out via satellite.

Upgrade the herd…what the brass will hopefully do this summer.

Verbicidal…the condition I exist in, believing that I’m skilled with the use of words (or a “verbalist”) but am in reality, grammatically challenged.

Zerotasking…what I have on my plate from the end of the hockey season until the opening of training camp.