MAN OF MY WORD

Remember that scene in Jerry Maguire, the one where Jerry and the stud young QB’s dad, Matt Cushman, are talking at the family’s house and the dad re-iterates he doesn’t do contracts but that "he has his whole word, and it’s stronger than oak"? Well I’m that football dad… my word is also... wait a minute...I just remembered, old man Cush went back on his word and signed with that Bob Sugar douche didn’t he? Ya, I think he did.

Uh, ok, lets skip the attempt at a movie analogy (good flick by the way). What I’m trying to convey to you is that I am backing up my verbal promise of providing free tickets to another game if the Stars did not win their season opening game against the Nashville Predators.

And here it is in bold print:

You glorious fans of the DStars who have a ticket stub from opening night can use that ticket stub as a voucher good for a free ticket to an upcoming game.

If for some reason you the ticket holding (or stub holding) fan cannot attend that game against the Preds, I will honor the my commitment of a free ticket on the Monday, Oct. 19th game vs. the LA Kings.

Lets review:

What you will need to collect and potentially bankrupt the Razorboy: Opening Night stub is good for Wednesday, Oct. 14th vs. Nashville (or Monday, Oct 19th vs LA)

How you go about making the Razorboy pay for his misguided guarantee: Fans can redeem their ticket stub at the Stars Offices in Frisco (M-F 9-5), AAC Box office (M-F 10-5). For questions, you can contact the Stars ticket office at 214-GO-STARS.

Restrictions (or, Razor’s fine print): Fans must redeem their tickets at least 24-Hours in advance of the game in person, tickets are subject to availability, and quantities are limited. Upper level can be redeemed for Upper Level, Lower for lower, Platinum for Platinum. (No cross-pollinating!)

What’s that you say? What if I’m absent-minded and lost my ticket stub or I was so distraught over the tie/shootout loss that I ripped my stub into confetti and used it for stuffing in my construction of a Dan Ellis voodoo doll?: If you are a fan who does not have his/her ticket stub then contact the Stars. The ticket peddlers there will look them up in the cutting edge, high tech computerized ticket system and take care of you on a case-by-case basis. (Which is how I prefer to be taken care of)

Yes you Dallas Stars fans, I am a man of my word. Unfortunately for the Stars record, and me personally, that word is Prognostitarded.

And finally, why do I have a sneaking suspicion that 30-40 thousand “fans” will claim to have been amongst the 18,500 in attendance on Razorboy's Stars Season Opener Sentry Safe Lead Pipe Lock Guaranteed Win Night?

Enjoy your free game people, but do so knowing that the Reaugh girls just had Christmas cancelled.

Go Stars.

Razor